Oh. Well… Okay. I mean, I don’t think he’ll like me enough to be that fazed. He doesn’t seem too attached. But I will be. Just for you, though.
Uh. I think it starts tomorrow.
He’s Julian Goldsworthy. Do you really think you know how he’s feeling? Because if you do, you must be a magical unicorn of emotion knowledge. But thank you. :3
Tomorrow? Well good! The sooner, the better. Come over after and we’ll talk about how much you (probably will) hate it and I’ll convince you to go back. Sound good?
(Source: jennytheprincess)
Heh. But, Jenn, when have I ever been attracted to anyone entirely sane? I know what you’re saying, though. I’m not jumping into anything; I don’t even know how I feel about any of this. Anyway. I’m starting with… Um… therapy. This week.
Noah was something else though. That’s not my point. My point is, you need to be careful about his feelings as much as yours. He seems unfazed by a lot on the outside, but come on. He’s just another guy who’s been through a lot.
Therapy? That’s good! That’s really good. When?
(Source: jennytheprincess)
I… I don’t know. I just think maybe I need to work… Myself out… You know? I dunno. Don’t think I’m ready for a boy or… Any sort of romance. I think I’m fucked enough as is without one.
I get it. Some Niq time with Niq. But you know, that can be as destructive as it can be helpful. You’ve had a lot of Niq time. Maybe you need a romance to show yourself that you can go on…. I don’t know, Niq. Ultimately, it’s up to you. I’m just saying, you should think about it. And while you do, remember, Julian’s not really the most stable guy ever either. Be careful, bub.
(Source: jennytheprincess)
But… I just… I don’t know, babes. I don’t know about Julian. He’s fun, and, I mean, I like him, but… I’m not sure I’m ready for that. Or if he’s ready for that. Fuck. I don’t know.
Niq, it’s been a while. If not now, with a boy you really like, then when? You’re scared. That’s understandable. But this feeling you have now, it’s never going to go away unless you fight it. I’m not telling you to jump Julian’s bones and attach yourself by the hip to him. But test out the waters. Maybe ask him on a date! Or something. It’s worth a shot, I know it is.
(Source: jennytheprincess)
The things you do [Aaron and Jenny]
Aaron gave his mom a quick ‘goodbye’ as he slipped on his jacket and made his way out the door, a small sigh escaping his lips. The week had been harder than Aaron had anticipated. He and Jenny had pretended to break up and it was extremely hard on him. He really liked Jenny and seeing her even pretend to be with someone else hurt, even if he knew that it was for the best. Aaron was understanding and that was a quality of his that even he liked himself. He sighed as he made his way up the motorcycle, starting it and made his way to Downtown Toronto, not looking forward to his encounter with Jenny. Sure, he liked her and promised to try not to make it weird, but he was only human. Of course it’d bug the hell out of him! All he could do was try not to let it show, which he was hoping he was successful at.
Although he had a hard time deciding what place to meet up at (He had to keep in mind that the paparazzi are fucking everywhere. If him and Jenny were spotted, their entire purpose would be destroyed and useless. He didn’t want that. They had to meet up somewhere that was practically unknown, unless searched hard enough. Since Aaron practically lived downtown, he knew all the spots that most people didn’t. They’d meet up in the diner 2 streets away from Aaron’s paint studio. It was perfect. Aaron was a normal customer and anyone went there, which made Aaron question as to how the diner was still standing. Aaron decided he didn’t care and moved on.
Aaron rode through the streets of Toronto with ease. Like painting, this was easy. Riding made him forget everything and just be free. The wind hitting his face seemed to make everything not important. Before he knew it, he was in unknown part of Downtown. He decided to leave his motorcycle in his art studio, since he was more than sure that he would need to have another escape in his art studio after meeting with Jenny. Aaron sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets and walked to the diner. He took a deep breath as he opened the handle of the diner, convincing himself that it’d be alright. He scanned the diner, a small smile tugging at his lips as he saw Jenny. “Hey.” he greeted, making his way to the booth she was in. “Not exactly a 4-star bistro, but still tasty.” he grinned. He could do this. He was with Jenny and that’s all that mattered.
Jenny didn’t like the pretending. She didn’t like the lying, the sneaking around, the sad look on Aaron’s face when he saw her walking down the hall alongside Nate. It crushed her. This entire fake break up and the distance she had to keep between her and her real boyfriend tore her apart. All she wanted to do was place her hand in his, kiss him until he smiled and go back to his studio. They could listen to music while lying down, the smell of canvas oils all around them, talking in hushed whispers. But to get those moments, she had to go through with it. To be with Aaron, she had to keep her father at bay and that meant going through with their plan. It meant hanging around Nate and his friends during lunch. It meant smiling at the paparazzi when the blue eyed boy was beside her. It meant waiting for Saturdays throughout the entire week.
So to say that Jenny was excited for her and Aaron’s little date on Saturday was an understatement. She couldn’t wait. She couldn’t wait to talk to him like she used to, hold his hand, run her fingers through his hair. She couldn’t wait to sit beside him and ignore the rest of the world. They had sneak around and hide from cameras, but once they managed that, they were free, free to do what they wanted with each other. Jenny made a point to look her best. Dressed in a lace dress and a pair of flats, she decided to let her hair down curly. No need to impress anyone. If she looked decent, that was all that was needed. She was comfortable around Aaron just as he was with her. It was unlike how she needed to be with Nate, when cameras and their fathers loomed over them.
They had agreed to meet at a small diner downtown on a street Jenny had never been to before and with the help of a few business men walking down the streets of Toronto, after hiding behind them as she scurried down the streets, she had managed to dodge the paparazzi outside her home, waiting to get a peek at her or Jimmy. It didn’t take long for her to arrive at the diner either. It was a cute little place, with red leather booths and black and white tiles on the floor. It smelled of greasy burgers and Jenny quickly realized this was far from the place she had gone with her father and Nate the past weekend. There, she had gotten a small salad and drank aged wine. Here, she was sure to indulge. She was excited, the butterflies in her stomach neverending.
And they didn’t let up when the boy finally came through the door. A wide smile appeared on her face as he scooted in and she shrugged, making room for him, “It’s cute.” Her eyes wandered over to his face and she couldn’t help but placed her hand on his, “Like you. I’ve missed you so much. I’m really glad we’re doing this.” By ‘this,’ she meant the cute date. She’d been looking forward to it after all. She only imagined Aaron felt the same way.
I know… I know he’s not coming back. But I swear, it’s like… It’s like every fucking day, I’m just waiting for him to call, waiting for him to come round and refuse to call me anything but Dominique. I don’t know what’s good for me, really.
You know, I don’t know what’s good for you either. But you know what I do know? All these random guys you fuck, this sadness that is always behind your smiles that don’t really reach your eyes anymore? That’s not good for you. It’s terrible for you. So maybe you should try something new. Maybe Julian is your ticket to move on and finally be able to laugh like you used to. All I know is hanging around the idea of Noah returning isn’t helping your own sanity one bit, love.
(Source: jennytheprincess)
I suppose.
I know, but… It’s not easy, you know? It feels like I’m just… Disrespecting his memory. But I’m not sure how to just… be.
Niq, you can’t put your life on hold for him. I know it sucks, baby, but he’s not coming back. And he would have wanted you to move on. It’s been a long time. I think what you have going is good for you. You just need to keep pushing through this sad feeling to realize it as well.
(Source: jennytheprincess)
I… Think so. I don’t know. I don’t know, I don’t fucking know. My head just hurts. I feel like I’m going to be sick.
Aw, babes. I’m sorry. Cuddle session tomorrow?
You know, I know you probably don’t want to hear it, but Noah wouldn’t have wanted you to be sad all the time. He loved your smile, remember? And so do I.
(Source: jennytheprincess)
